A Self Insertion
by P.L.S
Summary: A little bit of what I would do to Harry and Draco if given the chance- featuring Pop Star!Harry and Hollywood Playboy!Draco
1. 1

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

A/N: has a really bad report system set up. This was wiped from the board because and I quote . Yep, as you can tell there isn't a mod or anyone who goes over the complaints and verifies if the reported fic did or did not break rules. To make it worse I got a threat telling me that he/she/it was going to report the fic on Christmas if I didn't take it down myself, then went and reported it that day. So, I am reposting this for that liar and really annoying person. And for you who liked this, I'm separating this into chapters and adding more to it for you.

Part One: The Transport

Now, this was not what I had in mind. I just wanted a quick nap after my shower. So why the heck am I in the center of what looks to be the world's most out of order bookshop just in my robe?

Ah, hell. I muttered as I looked at all the people in odd clothes that looked to be the explosion of the costume department of a Shakespearian playhouse and a department store. Most of the people could match colors, as if to make up for the lack of matching eras, but there were far too many who looked to have no clue that blue and orange striped shirts had no business mixing with black and white polka-dotted pants. I couldn't help the disdainful roll of my eyes when the fool who was wearing that God awful combination stepped forward.

Um, miss? he asked timidly, oh, how did I miss the magenta and green cape with sleeves? His accent was British too. What did I get myself into now?

Who let you leave your padded room? Any fool knows your eye for color, pattern, and the year's trends are sorely lacking. I burst out. Yes, I know it was idiotic to critique his clothes when I was in a long blue bathrobe, but I had no choice in my clothes, unlike him.

I really know that the smirk I wore at his embarrassed look was also inappropriate, but could you blame me? Then again, don't answer that.

Now, who cares to tell me how I ended up here, after just sitting on my bed after a shower? I demanded, trying to look like I was pissed and better than them in every way. The pissed part was not hard at all, I was very peeved about missing a good nap. The arrogance part was natural, I've been playing that roll for years. It was the best way for me to get along in the world. I was medium height, rather stocky, and hated to deal with those who didn't see my intelligence, arrogance was needed to deal with them.

Oh, speak up. And while your at it tell me where the hell I am. I was in North America a few minutes ago. Finally eyes met mine, cold eyes. But they didn't flinch away, or look intimidated. I could work with that, You. Tell me what I want to know. I singled him out without a gestier, just a look and a few words. The rest looked at me as if I was mad, which I was, but not in the terms they were thinking of.

And who are you to command me? he asked in a proud, but very dangerous voice. This was a man who liked blood and could kill the second he thought he could benefit from it. Just like a few of my friends. I smiled at him as I thought of them, he was what they could be if they had some money, class, and years behind them.

Command? Who said anything about commanding? I've only been asking for someone to tell me why I am not in my nice warm bed, trying to think of a new clothing combination I'd like to wear, and wishing I didn't have to go to work. And if I'm late for work I will make each and everyone of you pay dearly. I couldn't help but snarl that last bit. The herd collectively cringed, but Mr. Ice was calm as a cucumber as were about seven others. He was even smirking at me. I couldn't help but smile at the thought of me dragging him to the bar I liked to hangout at. He would just fit in so well, aside from looking like a Dracula wannabe.

Yes, so I can tell. he seemed very put out that I wasn't scared of him.

You know, you're kind of funny. I said with a sweet grin and it totally threw him for a loop. Gotta remember that, could help in the getting him to get me home process.

You are insane. But to answer your question I have no idea what brought you here, nor how to remove you back to your nice warm bed'. He answered coolly.

Damnit all. Well, who's fault is it? I demanded, Whomever is responsible needs to come forth now or I will make each of you pay for my clothing, food, and whatever else I require while I am here. And I have very expensive tastes. I have yet to see a room clear out as quickly as it did right then. No loss, Mr. Ice and the Unintimatated Ones are still here, as is the clerk of the shop.

I'm Persephone Sanguinaire, who do I have the questionable honor of being in the presence of? I asked and saw the smiles on the youngest two and the grin on one of the women's face. Mr. Ice rolled his eyes, and seemed to take on his roll as host.

Lord Lucius Malfoy, this is my son Draco Malfoy. That dark specter is Potions Master Severus Snape, and beside him is Transfiguration Professor Minerva McGonagall, both teach at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. the names, oh, fuck. I'm in Harry Potter's damned world.

You have got to be joking. You people don't exist. I'm gonna take a wild stab at the last few, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and Harry James Potter, better known to the magical world as the Boy-Who-Lived, hated but still living with muggles who hate him, and the kid who looks and has far too much in common with Thomas Marvolo Riddle. The kid paled and shrank back while the Hogwarts teachers and Order members looked angry and the Malfoys looked amused and concerned.

How did you know that? asked Harry in his quiet but strong voice, he'd make a good figurehead or killer someday. I smirked at him.

Kid, I know things about you that you never want to let them know. I can tell them about grade school, about a few of your first tastes of magic. I can tell them about why it really took you so long to master the Patronius, why you didn't want to block out your dreams, and how much you deny about your little adventures into the world of hidden warfare. I said in my scary voice, as it was dubbed by a kid a used to baby-sit, You know you gotta wonder, Potter, why is it when you look like your daddy, you look like Voldemort. Even the eye color. Oh, this was fun. He looked scared of me, And don't get me started on other family resemblences, like the fact Severus Snape could be just another pseudonym, and that I'm starting to think you two have more in common than just being bullied as children and living in Hogwarts Castle. now Snape looked nervous and angry, I touched a nerve? Well, no matter. You wouldn't claim the son of your bully as a blood relation, nor would you care that his home life is abusive and has scarred him mentally. I bet he unconsciously links verbal abuse to affection, don't you, kid. I love messing with people's minds, But Perseus, you must tell me have you seen Petunia lately? You two both have perfectionist tendencies, and love to make Potter miserable in payment for his living when Lily died. But I suppose Petunia was jealous of you as she was jealous of Lily, and she might even think you are dead. spat Minerva after they all were starting to get over their shock.

Yes, yes. I suppose it is. I said with a casual air. Lucius was smirking at me and Draco looked very impressed. Snape looked like the other few, like he wanted to rip my throat out. I smiled sweetly at him, he was going to hate he forever. I looked about and sat carefully on a pile of books, crossing my legs and taking great pains to keep covered.

So how do you know all that stuff about him? asked Draco in a polite tone. I smiled at him, pleased someone knew how to ask a question nicely.

In my world you all are characters in a series of books and motion pictures. Who wants to take a stab at the name of the series? No one? Potter, it's all named after you. But no surprise there. But then again most of the fans of the books are betting on when and how you die in the books. Most of us think it's gonna have something to do with the brother wands of yours and Riddle's in your last year at Hogwarts. You'll all find it's no surprise that my favorite people in the books are you Malfoys, Snape, and Voldemort. Harry, I end up trying to plot your death myself in most of the books, but I do have to admit in your third and fifth years I almost liked you, because I saw that you are just like Voldemort, if a bit dense. Lupin, Tonks, you both are rather minor in the books, but I do have to admit you have fans. Why? I have no clue. And McGonagall, you wouldn't believe how many think your loyalty to Dumbledore is insane and are angry with you for not listening to your gut and getting Harry away from those muggles.You know it's at times like this I wish that the Unforgivables had exception clauses. Snape muttered darkly and really only the Malfoys looked like they were enjoying my company.

So are we talking Alternate Dimension, Time Travel, or are we not getting the loyalties we deserve for unauthorized publishing of our lives? asked Lucius Malfoy, and I had to laugh.

Well, unless you have the rights to your name, image, and experiences on paper, you'd lose that court battle in the U.S. I said and Lucius smirked.

I have the rights to all of the Malfoys as well as Potter's. I got his dirt cheap a few years ago. Lucius said calmly as Harry had to be subdued by Lupin and Tonks, Oh, calm down brat. I'll sell your name back to you.Wait give it to me. Once I get home I'll be swimming in cash! I'll even spilt the loyalties with you. I said exuberantly, You know, we could even book him on meet and greets, tv appearances, interviews, cameos in movies, and commercials.Hn. We could. If we are as popular as you say, then maybe getting young Mr. Potter into the public eye would be good for him. Lucius was smirking at Harry who was looking a bit hot under the collar.

Just think, if all goes well, we could be at the head of a media mogul that could dominate in almost every format. Harry, can you carry a tune or rap? he spat out glaring at me, and got me to thinking about getting him into some anger management classes.

Hn, too bad. But we could probably get him dancing, or doing background vocals. Music is where the money is, right after motion pictures. I told Lucius who was getting that excited glimmer in his eyes.

Yes, of course. But I have been told he has a reasonable voice. I'm sure we could convince him that maybe popular music is a good career path. If push comes to shove, I'm sure we could always put him in less than approved forms of media. Lucius leered at Harry who was fighting now. I couldn't help but laugh.

Harry yelled as he broke free of Tonks and Lupin and was looking for his wand. Luckily I saw McGonagall filch it earlier on.

Yes, Mr. Potter, porn, as you so charmingly called it. Young, fresh faced, heroic boy. I'm sure you'd be a success in that area. he said scathingly as Draco was laughing, and the Order looked ill. Well, Snape looked happy as he could get, as he watched Harry try not to kill us.

No way in hell. Harry said in a low voice and I grinned with Lucius.

That was sexy. Do it again! I taunted him and lucky for me Draco put a binding spell on him just as he was about to tackle me, See, natural. Okay. We have to carry out this evil plot to ruin his life.I suppose we do. It would be nice to hurt him legally. Okay, I agree. Come with me, we need to discuss terms, percentages, and the like. Draco, bring Potter with us. He needs to have some say in the contracts, even if it's just something we ignore. Severus, it was nice to see you again, and we must get together sometime.Good bye. Lucius, I think I need some proper attire. I'm totally nude under this thing. I said as we walked out and into the badly designed street of the marketplace.

-----


	2. 2

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

Part Two: The Details

Ah, the muggle in a witch's robe. Draco drawls as I step out of the changing rooms with the seemstress. I'm all decked out in a long royal blue gown-like linen robe with emerald green and redish purple trimmings and a golden sash in more of a princess dress fashion. I've always liked that style, it empesises my bust and hides my gut. I have golden velvet ballerina style slippers on my feet, even if you can't see them.

One thing I love about the wizards here, I can design my own clothes. And I look damned good.

You like it? I ask him in my siruppy voice.

Yes, those are great dress robes. But you don't need to dress up to shop. I couldn't stop my laughter.

Dragon, these are everyday robes. My dress robes, all three of them, are by far finer designs. I'll let you apprase them later though. One thing I've always been good at is clothing design. Maybe I should draw up some designs for you. You're going to be out of fashion once I hit the streets. The seemstress laughs.

I'd love to work with you again Miss Sanguinaire, and Mister Malfoy you are going to need to have some work done soon correct? She baits the trap. I promiced her that he would be paying for two large orders today once I found out how much more customization was. She waived the fees, but only as long as I talked Draco into her fitting rooms. I think someone has a crush.

Oh, fine. Lavia, Seph, you better make me look better than ever imagined. Draco mockingly growled and both of us smiled.

What colors?Let's try ivory, crimson, a few shades of teal, and bronse gold. Then I'll dig out your swatches again.I said without missing a beat. Did I mention that I love designing?

-----

I crossed my legs and smoothed out my long velvet robe of a grey-blue. Lucius and Harry watched me as I read the final draft of the contract from Epic Records. So far so good, really. Yes, this was an alternate reality, no Harry Potter books. But we worked around it. Lucius used his contacts to start Harry off in acting, and now after doing the theme song to his last television show, we were shopping about for a label for him to sign with.

Hm, I still say we could push for more, but Epic has put in a lot of good ideas, and they will give us almost total control of everything. Harry, I need to know, are you going to be serious about this? I asked. It was really amazing how much the kid has changed, and how at ease he is. Maybe this was what he really did need.

Seph, when have I ever fooled around? He answered with a cheeky grin.

Never, but we are worried. This isn't a shoot or set. It depends on only your dedication. Lucius said and Harry nodded soberly.

Everyone is watching for you to get in trouble. You saw the People last week, St. Evans.' I said in a cutting tone, Are you going to live like a rock star or professional when you go on tour, or even as you record?I'm a professional! I don't do anything you don't approve of. The girls and guys who throw themselves at me are always turned down with a smile and autograph. And you know unlike most, nothing illegal has touched me since a Crucious Curse in 1995. Harry answered back hotly.

Yes. Good. Sign it.

-----

Watching Harry get beat up by the ex-military physical trainer I found is fun. Besides, Harry has turned into a very hot young man. But don't get ideas. He's as into guys as I am, but that's okay. We go guy watching once a month or so.

Ah, a pina colada and watching my young charge getting yelled at. So nice. But really Harry has to get trained up, he starts his first tour in a month or two, so between over seeing the final preparations to his debut album, which is very good- even critics like it, coriography sessions because Epic found out just how adaptable and tallented Harry is on the dance floor, and the publisity, he's been busy. Lucius is over-seeing the wizarding release of Twisted Exspectations', which has to be one of the oddest things I've ever heard an album called, but it fits. Harry somehow has created a blend of Hip-Hop, Techno, Indie, and Xydeco. I'm not even sure how he did, but it worked, and looks to be a worldwide success. And that boy can really freestyle. I'm here on the homefront, making sure nothing goes wrong.

Ah, they started the kickboxing. Another thing I'm glad Harry has picked up.

----

I grinned as I finished setting up my new laptop, which just so happened to be the very best money could afford. Going into the word prossesser program, I started to rewrite what I remembered from my reading a year before as well as talking to the real people and reading the real histories. It wouldn't take me that long to create a bestseller. Of course, I did the research, just to be sure that the author didn't exist here. Lucky me, she didn't and I could use her as a psudonymn.

Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. They were the last people you'd expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, because they just didn't hold with such nonsense.

Maybe I should hire a ghostwriter.

And I know I need to change the names. From the past year of making sure that Harry was untouchable after that first lawsuit, the Dursleys are just the sort of people to sue for a kids book that has their name in it. Snape wouldn't sue me, he'd just kill me straight out and cast a curse on all those who read the books.

Then again, maybe I shouldn't even try to recreate the books I loved so much. Yeah, pointless to try to reinvent the wheel.

And a heck of a lot safer too.

----


	3. 3

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

Part Three: The Plan

Okay, I have to admit it. I planned this. Don't tell Draco.

Miss Sanguinaire, Mister Malfoy. A pleasure to see you two again. the producer from Paramount Pictures greeted us. Word has reached us that he has a movie that has a roll that was made for Harry, but can't find the lead. He also is a squib. I think he's the most fun guy to manipulate too. After all I created the script he's infactuated with.

Oh, you know I love to talk business with you, Arty. Now, what's going on? I declare with a smile that he thinks is beautiful, I don't know why. He works with supermodels, A-list actresses, and the starlets of the world, and he claims my smile makes his heart lighter. Insane blighter.

Oops, Draco's rubbing off on me.

I sent you the script last week. I just can't find a good actor for The Morning Star.' Harry suits the roll of Azreil, but Lucifer still escapes me. I'm hoping since you found Harry, you could find another like him, but opposite in many ways. Art Higgins smiled at us weakly and I hear Lucius sigh.

I read the script, and may have the one needed. He's not going to come cheap. Malfoy says with his evil undertones that make Art flinch.

Who is it? Another wizarding hero? he asks breathlessly.

My son.

Oh yeah, Draco's gonna get super mad about having to work with Harry, but he'll love being a star.

----

The scene opens to a dark night sky, stars look like they are trying to hide, but there are no clouds, and a new moon. The picture pans down to a young man with long curly black hair in a toga-like costume and large dragon wings of rust and gold folded at his back. He's watching the stars from the wall of a crumbling castle wall. Sighing, he toys with the straps of his sandles and looks almost pure of heart. But there is blood on a sword that lays next to him.

A shadow flies over him and the flapping of wings attacts his attention to a pale young man clad in an outfit like his with a double ended pike in hand and an arrogant look plastered on his face. His wings are made of greys and black, and he makes no effort to bother looking like less of a demon.

Azreil. Why are you here? he asks of the darker winged one with a hint of consern. The dark one smiles sadly and a tear slips down his face.

I was a Singer in the Chorus. Do you know how it pains me? Syphinus has already gone insane, Lucifer. How am I still here? he asks of the light one who looks pained as well.

We had to. You saw as well as I did how they tainted it all, even he's no longer perfect. The dark one leaps to his feet and grabbed his sword in rage.

I know that! You don't think I couldn't see how everything was twisted as soon as those beasts were given divine gifts. I knew it was wrong, I knew that they were flawed in ways that were damning to all of us. A dark fire burned around him in his rage and his sword was now at the light one's throat. The pale one looked calm and sighed which caused the dark one to lower his sword and look away, I'm the only rebeling Singer who still has form, who still has any sanity left. I want to know why. the fire is gone and he looks tired and sad again.

You are the strongest of the singers, you're songs are stronger than any other. Singers, as with we Watchers, are not formed equally. I'm sure tasting of their imperfection helped too. Syphinus was a strong Singer, but he refused what you embraced. Do you recall why?He said they had nothing to offer us but their corruption. I agreed with you, that I couldn't judge until I understood them, felt the beast and divine as one. Was I in the right? Or did I survive because I'm already corrupted? The dark one watches the light one laugh and look at the stars.

We were all corrupt before this started. Nothing was perfect, nothing can be perfect. he says with amusement.

Then why are we fighting? the dark one asks angrily.

I don't know why you are fighting, but I fight for the truth. the light one says with a smile at the dark one who looks angry.

Morning Star, you really get under my skin at times. the dark one flares his wings out and frowns, I'm going to Listen. Don't follow me this time! he vanishes in a flap of his wings and the light one just watches with a smirk.

Fool, idealistic fool. he mutters as he goes and stands where Azreil was sitting, And yet I'd have you no other way. It's good you can't see what you are fighting for, my dark fallen one. We fell together, but you didn't need to. Azreil, are you going to find out about me, about my plans? footsteps and a silky voice ruins the calm night.

Ah, bemoaning your beloved Singer who Listens to the humans? asks a dragon-winged woman in a robe and long golden hair. Lucifer smiles and winks at her.

You know me, I love Music, and Azreil is the only one who loves me more than that infernal Lord. he spits that title as if it were a curse.

Angry about the way Syphinus betrayed you? she asks and he scowls.

I made him pay, and luckily Azreil is blind to what we do. He only sees the most chaotic of the battles, and can't see past what lies I feed him. If I do my work right, he'll sing a new song soon, and will never go back to there again. Lucifer says finishing with a smirk.

Ah, the Great Damner of the humans will corrupt a true Singer? How do you plan this treachary? He still has perfection in his heart, he still sings , Holy, holy, holy'. she asks with a smile, Lucifer answers with a smile of his own.

He's tasted the pleasures of the flesh, he studies the humans, lists their wrongs as well as his own. Just one last thing is required, he needs to watch me fall in battle to Michael. Lucifer has a flicker of uncertainty on his face but that is covered quickly. The woman looks disturbed as well.

she whispers and Lucifer nods.

Yes. Michael was once in his order, one of the seventeen, all of different talents, but all of equal powers. Kind of like humans have their families. Azreil has yet to see his brother, for lack of better term, in battle.He's ruthless, Lucifer, you might not make it out okay! she blustered looking torn between anger and greif. Lucifer laughed.

I was in their order as well, and I know how to fight. We were the highest of the orders, and now we are torn. But that matters only in reflections. Prith, I want you to Watch Azreil. I will call when my traps are laid. Lucifer says as he turns back to watch the stars.

with that Prith vanished and Lucifer smiled coldly.

----

Draco! Look here! Harry! Please! A Minute of your time! Smile! Here! Draco! Harry! A comment!

I walked with Lucius's friend' Oberon Nott down the red carpet to our Rolles Royse, Harry was stag, but Draco had a girl on each arm. Just behind me Lucius and Narcissa walked looking very comfortable, like their son.

Cameras flashed and shouts rang out, the movie was going to be a hit. Draco and his twins got into a dark green and blue stretch Hummer and Harry got into a simple, classic, black stretch Mersedes. Now our car pulled up, Nott, the Malfoys and I got in and were finally safe from the photos and questions.

Well, Nott? I asked with a mischievious smile. He bet me a set of diamond earrings that he was going to hate sitting in a room full of muggles, watching their idea of entertainment. He scowled at me.

You win. It was good. he muttered and I beamed at him.

Thank you, I worked hard on it. I said and Lucius caught my comment.

You worked hard on it? he asked in a very cutting tone. Now, I see again why he was a good Death Eater.

I set Draco up to become an overnight star, and maybe to outshine Harry. Lucius looks flabbergasted as does Nott. Narcissa smiles at me and hands me a freshly poured flute of champaine, Thank you, Cissa.Not at all. I must thank you. Draco is happy, and if you made that happen celebrations and congradulations are in order. she said in her light nymph-like tone. Lucius frowned but eased back.

Yes, Cissa's correct. If you made this happen, by whatever means, then we owe you some thanks. Draco is happy, and bringing in as much reveinue as Harry ever did with motion pictures.I know. Harry's work on the soundtrack alone will boost that too, along with the ad offers that Draco's been getting. I think we'll keep Harry in the studio mostly, but if a good script comes we'll take it. Draco is in love with the cameras, so he'll take on more of the motion picture, promotional side of fame. I said with a smile. Nott looked at us as if we were the oddest things he had ever seen.

Yes, You may be correct there. Draco is much more at home on a stage than Harry ever was. Besides I don't see my son becoming a groundbreaking musician like Potter has. Nott, have you ever seen one of Potter's concerts?No, not recently. Nott says, looking uncomfortable. Lucius smiled.

You aren't missing anything important, but when you watch Potter sing, dance, and bind the audience, it is fasinating. I say with a smile, You don't think that we should bring Mr.Nott into our little world? I asked Lucius and Narcissa who smiled.

We will, if he wishes it. Lucius needs someone to help him manage Harry's assests on the magical side of things, and you need help manageing Draco. If he wishes he and I will be assistant managers for the two young men you love to manipulate into fame. Narcissa says with a serene smile and raises her flute to me, then drinks. I do the same.

Welcome to the team, can we say the same to you, Mr. Nott? I ask him. He laughs and nods.

Call me Oberon.  
----


	4. 4

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

Part Four: The Media

A pleasure, Mr.Malfoy. Katie Coric smiled and greeted Draco as he walked onto the set with a bright smile.

Please, call me Draco. I'm not old enough to be called Mr. Anything. Draco kissed her hand and sat down next to her and waited.

Of course. Well, congradulations on your first picture. Morning Star is already the top film in both the U.S. and your home, Britain. Katie said with her own megawatt smile.

Dear, I didn't think it was that good. Maybe Harry was right about this whole star business. Draco said.

Well, rumor has it that you and Harry Evans are old friends from school, and that he got you the roll. Draco laughed.

Katie, we were not, and still are not friends. We did attend the same school, but we hated each other and still dislike each other. I got the roll because my father and my friend are Harry's managers and they needed someone like me to play the devil. Draco explained.

If you don't mind me asking could you tell us more about your relationship to Harry Evans.It was simple, I insulted his friends, his family, and tried to get him exspelled many times. He insulted my friends, my family, and tried to get me exspelled many times. Miss Sanguinaire blackmailed Harry into his first audition, my father manipulated him into doing the picture, and until now I sat on the sidelines laughing as poor St. Evans has had to face his insecurities and become a star.So how did you get the roll?Miss Sanguinaire wasn't happy with just one guy doing her bidding, so she concocted the script that turned Evans into a fallen Angel and placed me as the devil. But you know I think I like the cameras. Draco smiled and winked causing Katie to blush a bit, The only thing I'm not happy about is having to follow Sanguinaire's rules of conduct.And what are the rules?Typical rules of the house, and enforcing the idea that I'm not allowed to drink more than a few drinks a night, smoke, or bed too many. It also has very harsh punishments. And you must know, Evans never needed the bloody rules, he lives like a monk.Anyhow, tell us more about your movie.Yes, that's why I'm here, even if you are quite the angel.Thank you Draco.Not at all. The Morning Star is mostly about the fight between Lucifer's fallen angels, who mostly dislike the way God created man, and God's archangels and all of Heaven. However Lucifer has most of the war scripted out and really just wants God's power for himself. Azreil is a peaceful angel who's very idealisic and sides with Lucifer because he thinks God royally messed up. Over time he starts to realise what Lucifer is really after, but he himself has become corrupted and has stopped caring about everything. It's really not that simple, but it's a very complex story, and that's the area where Evans and I play the largest rolls.So you really do just play the devil?Dear lady, trust me when I say the roll was very much like playing one of my ansestors. The Malfoy family is very old, and very political. The idea of the devil may have even sprung from one of my forefathers.Thanks for doing this interview, Mr.Evans. said Red Gilliham, a reporter for the _Rolling Stone_. Harry sat back in the chair and smiled.

No need. I'd rather do magazine interview than do the tv spots that my managers have Draco doing. That Coric bint gives me the shivers. Red laughed at the over done shuddering that Harry did.

Cool. So, I've gotta say that Twisted' is one of my favorite cd's and when it came out it was what played through the New York offices for a week or three. So almost all of us here are big fans of your music.You'll all be glad to hear that almost all the score and the soundtrack are either my work or I prodused it. Nothing that comes from this movie as far as music goes hasn't gone through my mixing board at least.Yes! I mean that's wonderful to hear. Can we expect more like Twisted'? Or did you try a new style?It's very much in tune with the feel of the movie but those who have tested it all can say that it sounds like my work. If anything, I can say that while it's not all up beat and more traditional and orchrastral than Twisted' was, it should please my fans.Do you have any samples from your work on the movie?Actually, I was going to drop a copy of the soundtrack off to the editor, but here. You'll get first listen. Red was absolutely silent as the first track played then he paused it.

Oh my God! You did all that?Well, the studio hired a really good orchistra, but the singing and stuff is me and a few others. It's kind of why the angel I play is called a singer. A singer's job is to well, sing.It does have the same feel as Twisted', I mean I can hear Harry Evans. But it also feels like a Beethoven or Handel thing too. Or like going to a really old church. I don't know how to describe it. But I love it.Great, but I really wish I knew what everyone keeps hearing that they claim is my feel'. I mean I'm really just writing what seems right to me, nothing special.Maybe that's it. You just write and preform music that is just you and nobody else.Anyhow, I need you to tell me about the movie.Er, it's just another take on the big Christian celestial battle of angel versus fallen angel. I play a fallen angel that Lusifer tricked into betraying God and by the time I realise I was tricked it's too late.That's it? I got this big huge summery from Malfoy.Well, do you want me to read off of that or can you just copy paste it to the end or in place of what I just said?I'll think of something. It's really good that this is a magazine interview. You'd be screwed if this was tv.Tell me about it. I'm just glad that Lucius and Seph have Draco to push around now. Maybe, I'll just hide and write music.Sounds good to me. I always liked you better as a musician rather than a movie star.True that.

----


	5. 5

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

Part Five: The Show

I saw Harry couldn't fight the grin as he walked up to the stage, winning best album at the Grammys was nothing to sneeze at for a British musician.

Er, thank you all for this honor. I have got to thank my slavedrivers, oops, I mean managers, without your machavillian tendencies, blackmail, pestering, and threats I wouldn't have done more than sit in my cottage and play cards with friends. Thanks to Epic, for really wanting my talent and giving me the best shot I had at doing something I'm proud of. A big load of thanks to my fans, you lot have done the most work of the lot I'm thanking, you bought my albums, listened to my songs, and came to my concerts. Thanks goes lastly to Draco, you prat. I'm happy that Persephone finally ensnared you so I could do more music than acting and endorsements. Harry grinned cheekily and went back stage, he had a number to do soon.

The lights dimmed, smoke slowly obsured the stage and music started to play,

By starlight I hear your cries,  
tears shine like diamonds in the full moon night.  
Always alone at heart,  
I know your pain,  
I feel it too!

A great eagle cries and swoops down from the rafters, as it reaches the stage a lit explosion of smoke echos and Harry walks out of it looking like some weary traveler of the middle ages. The music is fast and Harry flings off the robes and is in a street styled leather outfit that he can dance in. Simalarly dressed dancers come out of the smoke and join him as he starts in on the complex and demanding dance that goes with the new song.

Oh, don't you dare,  
hide that heart away from me,  
You know I can dig,  
I can find the hurts you hide from the world.  
You know they never understand,  
but what about me?  
I've seen too much,  
caused too much pain not to know the ache.

Harry's voice carries over the crowd, most had seen his music videos, but Harry is very much a preformence artist. And as he and his backup dancers twist to the music it is very clear to every singer and produser that Harry is not lip-syncing, and he is not having a bit of trouble keeping up.

Child, don't you see it?  
The damage the charade does?  
The more you hide the more it eats away.  
Your killing your soul!

With that the tempo changes and he's joined by two other singers, both wizards. The music is slower, more church-like to me.

As the sun rises,  
As the moon cycles,  
As the stars shine,  
I'm never going to leave you.

They sing in harmony, sounding in what almost could be a barbershop style, but too solumn and too etherial. It takes the breath away from alot of people.

Let me tell you of a new world,  
Where dragons fly,  
And fairies still live in the fields,  
Then I'm going to show you it all.  
Let the magic in your heart grow,  
never doubt it at all,  
Let it out and smile,  
as I cast a spell to take you with me  
To where the pheonix lives.

I smile, letting his song just wash over me. There isn't any fanfare for this part, just three wizards in the center of the stage, the only lights are on them as they let their voices mirge and they let this song be heard for the first time ever. As they draw to a close, they don't just fade out. Harry sings alone the last verse and chorus in Latin with a powerful echoing voice that no one will ever be able to forget.

Potter, you just became a legend. I heard Lucius mutter and I could see his satified smirk.

Agreed. Amazing though, that he found two willing backups on such short notice. Oberon said. Narcissa laughed.

Not really, both are up and coming wizarding stars who want to break into muggle media. Seph and I negosiated contracts for them to join us on tour for the next album, as both opening acts and as singers for this song. she said with a slight shrug.

Where's Draco? I asked. Lucius nodded to where I saw Britany Spears sitting. Draco was right next to her, and she was blushing while he was whispering in her ear, You can see what will be on the front cover of Us and People tommarow. Oberon said with a chuckle.

I see this as the headline- Brit and the Brit, together until he finds a new blond. I said and Lucius frowned at me, You have to admit, your son is either a commitment phobe, or he just likes having as much fun with girls who all have the same hair color as he can. Lucius was about to snap at me when Narcissa stepped in.

Don't even try to defend your son's virtue, he hasn't any left. she said to him, Seph's got a good point there dear. Draco is seen with at minimum three girls a week, all blondes, and at least one is usually high profile.At least he's having fun. said Harry as he sat down at our table again.

What's wrong? Can't perform in that arena? asked Oberon. Harry sighed.

No, I just want to meet someone who doesn't care about the money or fame, of both worlds. we all clapped as everyone else did and Harry smiled as he watched Draco go through the dialogue with caustic tones towards his co-presentor, Kid Rock. Before it could escaltate they handed over the mike to the winner and looked ready to beat each other up.

Just as the winner was finishing his speech, the two lunged at each other and started to fight. Draco was doing fairly well, but Kid Rock was bigger than he was. Harry was the first on stage to get between the two and fling them apart.

Don't you dare start again. Draco, I'm going to throughly make you pay for ruining tonight. I don't care who started it, you have more than enough experience to know how to hold it in. Harry growled out, Or are you not a Malfoy? Draco glared at Harry who smiled.

Got it, Evans. Swords or fists? Nott made his way to the stage bringing two large swords.

'Ere you are. he said as he handed over the two gleeming pieces of art. Draco swung his around, testing it. In a bright explosion both were clad in tight leather trousers, boots and arm guards, and loose linen shirts. Draco grinned ferally.

Clear the stage. I'm going to fliet you, Evans.In you dreams, Malfoy. Harry said in a low voice. His face was hard as he held the sword out. I could see the production staff do some quick work, lights flashing, fast dance beats blasting, fog covering the floor. Draco and Harry seemed to dance as they parried and slashed at each others arms, legs and heads. Each young man was panting hard and sparks flashed as the swords clashed.

Give it up, I'm the swordsmaster here! yelled Draco as he almost had Harry pinned. Harry did a summersualt over him and laughed.

But I'm the hero, remember? Harry teased. Draco spun and soon they were back in their dance of life and death.

Bloody prat! Harry cursed at Draco nicked his chest. He soon had retribution as he gave Draco a nice cut on the upper left arm.

Insipid jerk! Draco yelled as he jumped out of the way of another blow. The childish name calling echoed as they faught harder, each trying to draw more blood than the other. I rushed to the production booth, where I saw the flurry of cheerful orders being flung around, as they captured the fight as if it was meant to happen.

Miss Sanguinaire! a large man in a suit called my name.

He grinned.

While this is going to push the show back, we are so glad your two started this impromptu fight. Saved face, and is gaining us watchers as we speak. Ratings are skyrocketing!That's good. Is there anything you need my help with?No, not at all, most of the staff knows with this as part of a resume, they can get on any action picture staff, they are bursting with joy. But tell me is this mock or real? I frowned.

It's real. The swords, the fighting, the blood. I'm hoping Lucius gets his head on soon enough and stops it before they get too into wanting to maim.But how did they both just change into that getup? And the swords?It's our own magic. You know SEM United keeps it's production and personal secrets well guarded. I looked at the stage. Harry was ducking under a swing and getting ready to jump.

a loud voice shouted and both boys were frozen by a flash of light from the shadows. Three spot lights stopped flashing as did the music. Lucius was caught in one of the spot lights, in flowing silvery robes that only enhanced his coloring and made him look like he was glowing. In one hand he held his dark silver topped cane, elongated to look like a staff, in the other was a long claymore sword. In a flash both stood at attention before him looking ashamed, and he started touching his cane to each of the wounds, healing them. He smirked and in another flash both were back in their tuxedos and the swords were gone. Lucius vanished and both boys took a deep bow before retreating off stage.

The resounding applause was beyond what happened during Harry's song. And the Grammys are still looking for an act as good as those two brats.

----


	6. 6

Title: A Self Insertion Story

Author: P.L.S.

Rating:PG or PG13

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. But as you will learn, I often dream about owning him, body, mind, and soul.

Summery: A funny little collection of things I'd do to Harry and Draco if I were in their world/ had the blackmail material/ or the shear power.

Part Six: The Solutions

Miss? Miss Sanguinaire? He taps me on the shoulder, trying hard not to disturb me as he tries to get my attention. It's funny really, most wizards and witches assume that since I order Harry and Draco around and am on such great terms with the Malfoys and Notts that I must be a powerful witch. The Brits all think I'm a Death Eater too. It positively is hilarious, to see the scared or awe struck kids as Narcissa and I go shopping. I'm surprised they don't refer to my last name as well, or turn me into a vamp-kin. After all, Sanguinaire is French for blood thirsty. Oh, maybe that's where they get the Death Eater idea from.

I sigh and make an irritated face.

Um, a Mr. Gregory Goyle from Strongarm Services is here to see you. he says meekly.

Send him in. Lord knows he's not doing any good looking at the portraits in the foyer. I hiss at him. Wonderful, he pales, jumps, and scurries to obey. I like the mentally scarred servents.

Mr. Gregory Goyle, miss. he announses the burly and rather tall looking man in dark robes of a business man. I wave the servant away and smile at Draco's old classmate.

Mr. Goyle, wonderful to meet you. Draco and Harry have told me so much about you and a Mr. Vincent Crabbe. I say and show him to a comfortable seat across from my favorite lounge.

Really? So, why'd you call to set up an appointment? he asks with a slight smile of his own. Note to self- while not very well-spoken has a bit of a business man's shine to his eyes.

Harry and Draco are getting threats along with the typical fan mail and just the other day Oberon had to neutralize a threat that was made against Draco during a press junkett. I'm hoping I could find people they both know and trust, or just know to help us keep our boys safe.I see. Well, as you know Strongarm is a security company with specialization in heavy personal protection, including our top ranked bodyguards and our internationally acclamed warding department. No person, place, or thing we have guarded, to date, has ever been hurt, killed, damaged, or stolen. If you want to hire us to guard Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, you can make no better choice. Goyle says with a slight smile. It sounds like a practised speech, but it does it's job. However, I'm not satified.

But you must understand, it's not the company, it's the people. You probably know both of them are paranoid to a fault, and they think they can take care of themselves. If anything I need them to either trust the guard or never see them.No problem. Crabbe and I will personally select a group of Hogwarts alumni and each take up the challenge. Goyle said with a confident look about him.

Are you sure? I had to ask. I'm not about to take chances here. Draco and Harry are both adament about being able to handle themselves, but no one is perfect.

Is a Thestral black? he grinned.

How the hell should I know? I'm a muggle. he looks surprised and a bit worried.

It is.Oh. Okay. Just kind of try to steerclear of the wizaphors, and I won't fry your motherboard with muggle ones. I grinned at the puzzled look and smile of understanding.

I understand your point now, Miss Sanguinaire. he laughed.

Call me Persephone, or Seph. I held out my hand.

he shook it with a firm, but not bone-crunching grip. Then a grin came over his face as he gave into an inner desire, So is it true then that you are a vampire or half-vampire? If you're a muggle, you couldn't be a Death Eater or Morgana reborn.

Scratch what I said earlier, they made the connection.

----

But whinned Harry, I just want to go to their wedding. They were my best friends from eleven on, I should at least go. He gave me his best puppy dog look, which was admittably good, but only worked on those who were dog lovers. Me, I'm a cat lover. You ignore them, they ignore you, everybody is happy and it makes those very rare moments when you need a pet or purr all the more special.

Harry was deffinatly barking up the wrong tree, but I'm guessing both Lucius and Oberon told him that he had to ask me. Smart men, they know me far too well. I couldn't help the horrid play that sprang up, thus I gave the poor sap a sympathedic smile.

Oh, I suppose I should let you take a break from your tour for this event. Harry's face grew into a hopeful smile, pathedic, But I would have to tell the twenty-five thousand who each bought a ticket at a minimum of a very high thirty-five American dollars each, that the one they are spending their time and money to see and worship can't keep to his obligations because his old childhood buddies, who don't even write regularly, are getting hitched on very short notice and invited you, maybe as an afterthought to boot. With each word Harry's face fell and by the end he was looking at the floor. I turned and left the room, my work was done. Somedays I loved my life.

It was another two days before Harry brought up the wedding, and he had a solution. Portkey-ing. He did the math and made a deal with the Grangers and Weasleys, he also begged Severus Snape for an energy potion as he was going to sing at the wedding and resepetion in exchange for them changing the time by a couple hours.

It was presented in such a way that covered for almost all but the most dire situations. I had to say yes. Especially after Harry had shown inisiative two years ago an had Voldemort, along with the more gung ho of his Death Eaters, assassinated by a muggle terrorist organization from the Middle East. It was some group that was now on a jihad now that the old leader was obliviated and living in a villa in Brazil. The only danger was of him getting plastered then laid, but even that wouldn't happen. Harry's personal contingent of bodyguards were all to cast a charm that would get rid of the alochol content of all his drinks on anything he ingested as well as carry two vials of the now comersially sold Hangover Solution Potion.

So with my blessing and suggestion to get them an acromantilla egg, he went off to shop for the best gift in the world for a new married couple. Draco suggested dueling pistols and live ammo (the brat has exsellent taste.) Harry told him to get stuffed then was told by Lucius that he was right. After all, the pistols were obviously too complicated for Ron Weaslsy, a board with a bent and rusted nail would be better suited to him. Harry then told Lucius just what he could do with said board, Lucius drew his wand and I left the room. No point in me getting hit by the spell-fire.

Narsissa then took the liberty of ordering several suggestions. One was a silver chandelbra set from Tiffany's with the wedding date on one, the new wedded couple's names on the other, and both with the Weasley family crest and motto. The second was a custom earring and choker set of diamonds and both of the soon to be Mr. and Ms. Weasley's birthstones. The last was a twenty place setting of the china that the couple had regestered for.

Harry's biggest trouble then was how to pick the best gift, in the end he picked the china and got Narcissa a day at a spa for two to get her that second (or twenty-second) honeymoon she had been grousing about for a few days.

----


End file.
